My son William just informed me that he might — might — be interested in men, sexually.

What a fag.

In response to this horrifying news, I smashed a wooden ladder over his head (the ladder had seen better days, admittedly, so I wasn’t doing much harm to the household supply of necessary tools and utilities) and then kicked his face into the steel door behind him, and then told him that Samisotas aren’t wusses. They know how to fight.

I think the kid got the message. Updates will be posted if the child seems willing to repent his ways…